It makes me sad…


It makes me sad that today’s society functions in such a way that I feel nervous being home by myself when two guys come to install a new front door.

The thought of being in the house with these two guys I don’t know has been freaking me out to the point that I pretty much told a friend of mine I would be IM’ing her while they were here in case they tried to attack me or something.

To be honest, the likelihood of something like that happening is not high, but it COULD happen.  I mean, they work for a reputable company so I assume they have had background checks and all that.  But, the possibility is there so that’s all I’ve been able to think about.

And I kind of hate myself a little bit for being nervous, because I’m treating these (so far perfectly nice and professional) men like criminals.  Or potential criminals, anyway.

But, and this conversation has been had so many times recently because of the cases making the news, our society teaches women to do what they can to not be attacked.  So,  here I am sitting in the comfort of my own home trying to take precautions against something bad happening to me.  Instead of being able to trust that the strangers I’ve met have been taught that it’s just wrong to attack someone.

The more I write about this, the more ashamed I am about having these feelings and thoughts.  And that’s just another sign of what’s wrong!  I shouldn’t be ashamed of wanting to protect myself.  But, as a female, I’m supposed to be nice to everyone and welcoming to people.

Ugh, I don’t even know where I’m going with this.  Nowhere I guess.  It’s a frustrating sign of the way society currently functions.  But, I will be online with my friend until they leave, just in case.

About Kayleigh

I'm an accountant by day and a writer by night - or any other time I can find to put words on paper. I live in the state shaped like a mitten with my husband, two cats, and a ridiculously energetic Beagle puppy. I love books and I buy way too many of them. But I maintain its a healthier obsessions than others out there and since I buy a lot of them in electronic formats no one has to know exactly how many I have. :P

2 responses »

  1. It could happen. Anything could happen. Writers are filled with imagination. It's true. I have to stop myself when my Imagination takes a nose dive to the dark side. Meditate on something positive. I'm a firm believer that often we create our own scenarios in our lives. Whether good or bad. Just push those freaky fears from your head. –I work hard at this regularly. Xx. 🙂


  2. I've had similar thoughts when I used to jog in the woods or anywhere slightly remote. I couldn't relax because as a woman I felt like I had to be so on guard. Some of it is the fear mongering news we see all the time (and I try to avoid), but some of it is real and it does happen in our world.


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